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A good number of women who are attacked are chosen because of theway they presented themselves. Something about their posturetold the assailant, ¡°here is a weak woman, I can take her¡±. Ifyou are scared out of your gourd, it will show.
Low self esteem or fearfulness looks like slouched shoulders;head down, arms folded in front or in pockets. Confidence lookslike walking tall, shoulders back, head up, eye to eye contact,arms at the side. One statistic revealed that those trained inmartial arts are less likely to ever be attacked because of theway they carry themselves. They¡¯ve been trained to defendthemselves and to not take a weak position. They haveconfidence.
Try this experiment. The next time you¡¯re in a public place,mall, grocery store, the beach, no matter, walk past all thepeople and look them directly in the eye. You might want tosmile a little or offer a ¡°how ya doin¡¯?¡± so they don¡¯t thinkyou¡¯re stalking them. You¡¯ll be amazed at the number of peoplewho will not look at you. They¡¯ll look down or away but not atyou. Of course, in some cultures it¡¯s not proper to look peoplein the eye. Be sensitive to that. But in many circles you willfind it hard to find 10 people who will look at you.
By you looking at them, in some subconscious way you¡¯recommunicating that you are not afraid. You¡¯re not sendingnonverbal clues that you lack confidence. To get into thepractice of always looking people in the eye, take it one stepfurther and see what color eyes they have. It only takes a quickglance, you¡¯re not starring down people but if you make an effortto determine eye color, you can be confident that you¡¯re properlylooking people head on in the eyes.
Get your hands out of your pockets when you walk. Uncross thosearms that are locked across your chest. Not only does it lookstronger and friendlier to have open arms, it¡¯s safer. Shouldthe need arise that you need to thwart off a would-be attacker;you¡¯re going to need your arms to free yourself. How easy it isfor one to come up from behind you and grab you if your arms aretucked neatly away? You¡¯re just making it easy. How can youpoke out eyeballs, or jab Adam¡¯s apples or throw an elbow to theribs if your arms are hugging yourself.
¡°But I AM scared,¡± you confess. There are two things you can doabout that. One is take some self defense classes and learn howto not be afraid. The other and immediate method to change howyou project yourself is to fake it until you make it. You may bescared out of your wits, but if you get the self talk going, ¡°Iam NOT afraid¡± and get the body language to follow it, head up,shoulders back, arms open, then you¡¯re at least giving theallusion that you are not a weak prey.
Half of your battle is in the mind. Do something about it.
The information contained in this article is for educational purposes only and is not intended to medically diagnose, treat or cure any disease. Consult a health care practitioner before beginning any health care program. About the Author Emily Clark is editor at Lifestyle Health News and Medical Health News where you can find the most up-to-date advice and information on many medical, health and lifestyle topics.
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